Let’s focus on what’s really important in the world right now.
The Olympics? No, those are over. And might I add, the US Boxing team brought back one single, solitary bronze medal.
The DNC? No, that’s pretty much under control. There will be snark upcoming, but I got nothing right now.
I’m talking about the really important stuff:
Dancing With The Stars released its Season 7 celebrity list! Oh thank god, I’ve been waiting with baited breath!
Tapping their tootsies in Season 7: All My Children‘s Susan Lucci, reality TV star Kim Kardashian, singer Toni Braxton, N*Sync’s Lance Bass, Oscar winner Cloris Leachman, Super Bowl ring bearer Warren Sapp, chef Rocco DiSpirito, Hannah Montana‘s Cody Linley, beach volleyball gold medalist Misty May-Treanor, comedian Jeffrey Ross, track gold medalist Maurice Green, and actor Ted McGinley.
— The early favorite should be Lance Bass and Toni Braxton, considering they’ve had to dance before in some form or another.
— Cloris Leachman? I’m sorry, was Queen Elizabeth II unavailable?
— Ted McGinley. This is bad. You do realize that every show in the 80s that Ted McGinley joined the cast of, died in about a few seasons? Does he still have that death touch?
I’m fearing for the life of the show.